Posts by Coffee House Girl

37

Are any of you addicted to your new sexual revolution?

by Coffee House Girl in

now that i am free from my bonds to an organization dictating to me what i can and cannot do (in bed included), i cannot stop.....i feel like an addict on coke or something, i have been with my bf for eight months now, and perhaps it is a combination of the newness of a sexual relationship with the release from my spiritual bonds, but....i feel like a cat in heat 24/7.

of course my bf is not complaining even though i see he is physically tired parts of the day that i actually leave him alone (to go to work or sleep after hours of lovemaking).

i wonder if anyone else has gone through similar experience.

Coffee House Girl

Now that I am free from my bonds to an organization dictating to me what I can and cannot do (in bed included), I cannot stop.....I feel like an addict on coke or something, I have been with my BF for eight months now, and perhaps it is a combination of the newness of a sexual relationship with the release from my spiritual bonds, but....I feel like a cat in heat 24/7. Of course my BF is not complaining even though I see he is physically tired parts of the day that I actually leave him alone (to go to work or sleep after hours of lovemaking). I wonder if anyone else has gone through similar experience.

What I am doing is "safe" of course, and it is with a man I love, and I never felt the same desires with my JW husband (he had to beg me for it, and my labido was pretty low).

I just hope my love for this man grows and I am not just compensating for something, or making up for lost time. I cannot talk about this openly with anyone at work (too personal) so anonimity helps on this forum

I am not going nympho am I??

19

How Did You Move on to Relationships with non-JWs?

by daringhart13 in

this is a really fascinating topic for me.....mainly because i'm single lol.

but what was it like to navigate through the waters of other people while getting into relationships?

did you wonder what to do about holidays?

Coffee House Girl

I am eight months in a relationship with a non-JW, he is a Christian- we have open honest discussions about religion, JW life, and holidays. He is a good listener and lets me talk about it when I am ready. He did not push me to celebrate Christmas this year, and I chose not to participate this time. He did not put up a tree in his appartment, but he did put lights in the windows, and at my request he did not get me a christmas gift. He is letting me decide what I want to do without pressure from him (he says I have been through enough pressure from the borg, and I need to start deciding things for myself).

I also loved Ynot's comments about good old uncle Fred and the oral speech - it is so true outside of the borg. My BF has also been patient with me in that area to express myself when I am ready, and boy I am ready and enjoying every bit of it!

I also am going to college at 30, getting a new broadened view of the world (not the JW definition of "world"). It is never too late to go back-

12

Training us better to talk to people at the doors.

by life is to short in

ok so many of you did not mind sitting and wasting time in a car while out in service because it beat banging on doors and trying to convince someone to join a religion that at least i could not fully explain even to myself much less someone else.

i agree sitting in a car beat banging on doors hands down.

but was it not crazy going door to door.

Coffee House Girl

I couldn't agree more, the only people I got to respond to my presentations and take my magazines were the mentally ill or creepy men who got excitied at the thought of maybe getting into my pants & I had to pawn him off on a brother....

I had no idea how to help the mentally ill really....

I am going to college now to become a social worker and really help people for the first time in my life, not just throw useless magazines at them about whales, smoking, growing corn....WTF

good thread

CHG

10

what were your meetings for field service experiences?

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

my mom (still in the borg) was telling me about going out with the c.o and his wife this week in field service & i started re-living the horror show that would go on during saturday meetings for field service-.

ah... the dreaded splitting up into car groups... i always felt like we were in gym class being grouped together for a game of dodgeball-.

the co and elders were the team captains and we would line up for the count.

Coffee House Girl

My mom (still in the borg) was telling me about going out with the C.O and his wife this week in field service & I started re-living the horror show that would go on during saturday meetings for field service-

Ah... the dreaded splitting up into car groups..

I always felt like we were in gym class being grouped together for a game of dodgeball-

The CO and elders were the team captains and we would line up for the count

They would make up their car groups with people they liked and would give em an "easy" morning (such as pioneers with many RVs, other friends they could knew would be ok if they made a breakfast stop, ice cream break, rest stop at a gas station, visit this infirmed sister, yada yada)

That left in the lineup- the mentally daranged scizo's, the people that smelled like dirty hair and BO, kids needing a babysitter for the morning, and the uber-zealous "lets do territory all morning", and me (who didnt fit in with the cliques, although I will admit the borg left me a little in the mental group)

My heart was pounding, I was sweating, I was trying everything I could- avoiding eye contact when they were putting together the car groups from hell.....oh shit!!! they saw me, damn...

ahh...I LOVE sleeping in on saturday mornings... and when I saw a few car groups driving around last week for the CO visit, I breathed a sigh of sweet relief..

what are your experiences??

34

How many you you hated to wait in the car while someone was on a good call!

by life is to short in

jw
friends

something i have not heard before on this board is waiting in the car out in service or any of the woman who were elders wives waiting on their husbands while in an elders meeting.. i was 24 years old when i got married to an older man he was 41 and had been an elder for about 12 years.

i truly loved my husband when we got married.

i truly loved him like crazy.

Coffee House Girl

Yup, no question....sitting in the car while someone was at the door was way better than door to door territory. I was just explaining to my bf over the weekend the driving rules for field service, he has never been a witness and laughed so hard at my explanation of "pioneer speed".

He drove 40mph just for me to relive the good old days,

so glad I will never have to sit in a car like that ever again, saturdays are sweet-just as they should be

32

Anyone look at this board while still an IN and ACTIVE JW?

by Mad Sweeney in

jw
friends

i vaguely remember looking at this board a few years ago, before i ever considered leaving the borg, and being appalled at the evil and hateful attitudes i saw here and scared to death of reading any further.. now i go back through years and years of posts and there is no evil or hate there at all.

it's one of the most kind and welcoming boards i've encountered since the invention of the internet.. that is how well borg indoctrination works.

it is eerily like 1984. black is white.

Coffee House Girl

I would never have even dared to think about reading apostate websites, I was one of those "loyal" jerks who would even scoff at my jdub friends who emailed me newspaper articles about JWs- I would think they were bordering on apostacy for reading "worldly" slants on the ORG.

Now that I swallowed the blue pill - I found this site a month after I stopped going to meetings & I am so thankful for everyone's insight and supports.

Thank you all for sharing your personal stories, you have no idea how much you have helped me see the real "truth".

44

New here...

by hereiam! in

jw
friends

sorry if this starts off as a kind of a downer.. i am 29, and my husband and i have stopped going to meetings since last october.

we live in mexico and used to attend the english.

long story short, after realizing how many much we've been lied to we stopped going to our meetings, moved out of the territory, switched to spanish, and after a month of attending just vanished.

Coffee House Girl

Welcome to the group,

I also can relate, I had panic attacks and nightmares about how my family would react to my leaving, but it was still something I HAD to do- telling them in person was the hardest thing I have ever done, but I did survive the ordeal & I know you will too.

Yes there will be depression and confusion and anger (and I've never been pregnant, so your feelings are many more times intense), that is completely normal

Getting some professional help is important if it is available in your area, I am happy you have your husband with you supporting you during this difficult time....

hugs to you both & keep us posted on how you are

CHG

26

Who picked your bible? And which one do you use?

by cyberjesus in

since there are many many translations of the bible, which one do you use?

how did you decided which one to use?.

what research did you do on that particular version and/or canon?

Coffee House Girl

As part of the graduate program in the university I am enrolled in, I am in a "Christian Foundations" class & we all received shiny new NIV bibles-

this is my first experience with another translation other than the NWT- prior to this I was still quoting NWT in my college papers

my prof is using the NIV to show me the inconsistencies with the trinity doctrine & JW views, I find it very interesting and am weighing my thoughts on what the borg brainwashed me to believe- JWs are taught that the Holy Spirit is God's active force, and what the professor is showing me: the borg changed the use of personal prounouns when referring to the Holy Spirit (which christians view as a "helper" in the triune godhead sharing one essence).....very interesting...........

136

Memorial 2010 Your Experiences

by scotinsw in

just got back from memorial.

only went so that i could say to my parents that i had gone and to remind myself why i left.. oh my word!!!

it was sooooo painful.. got there a bit late - it was a couple of minutes into the talk.

Coffee House Girl

I had a gut wrenching night, first memorial I missed. I was working- but I was in knots. Thankfully after work I had a nice 5 mile run, came back home & my bf gave me a shot of vodka & we drank a beer together. The next day I felt much better (slightly hungover but that felt better than guilt), so glad I don't have to face it for another year!

I expected an "I'm disappointed in you" call from my mom or someone, but I escaped with no responses!

I enjoyed reading everyone's posts on what I missed- reinforces how much I do not want to go back to that mind numbing cult

Thank you everyone,

CHG

44

Not Getting Over It! Ex-JWs Face Residual Psychological, Physical Damage

by TMS in

jw
friends

this is not an essay or "my story".

these are just a few personal observations from someone who lived, breathed and.

slept the jw religion for over 50 years.

Coffee House Girl

Thank you for sharing TMS, reading this thread is reliving what I have been thinking for the past couple of weeks. I finally said to a friend on Tuesday night (not a jw or exjw so they dont understand), I have lived for 30 years waiting...waiting for something to happen- waiting for my life to happen & it was just passing me by. I was waiting for my parents to die before I could start a life (I feel sad and ashamed that I felt that I had to stay in it for my family) I lived for 30 years in shame, guilt, and regret. That was WAY TOO LONG. I refuse to waste any more time on that, I resolve to say no to fear, guilt, and regret and enjoy life and what lies ahead for me. I now have a life of my own making, WOW...that is exciting.

Thank you

CHG